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Play with Guns

Boys Will Be Boys…
and That Means They’ll Make A Gun Out of Anything!

To Allow Play with Guns...
or Not...
What parent or teacher of boys has not struggled with this question?

Early childhood teacher, author of Heaven on Earth, A Handbook for Parents of Young Children and mother of three boys, Sharifa Oppenheimer believes that...while we can recognize the desire for the “grand adventure, for the drive and daring energy that gun play involves,” we can still discourage the violence. She believes “it is the excitement and the energy behind gun play that is so compelling for many children, not the violence.”

You may find the following ways in which Ms. Oppenheimer handles Gun Play in large groups and at home helpful as you decide how to handle this hot topic...

Kids Playing with Guns in Large Groups

In large groups of children, Ms. Oppenheimer maintains the policy of...

No weapons.

If children use fingers or sticks, she reminds them...

No pointing.


She then offers children who want to play with guns these alternative ideas that are “filled with the adventure and excitement, with the hiding and intrigue that gun play involves… encourage them to be arctic explorers, caught in a blizzard, or paddling down the Amazon in a boat with huge pythons slithering by, or even firefighters saving dozens of people.”

She says that “usually this kind of suggestion sparks ideas of their own, and they are off and running.”

Playing with Guns at Home

At home, Ms. Oppenheimer handles the gun play issue differently. Her natural inclination was to forbid gun play but feared the ‘forbidden fruit’ syndrome.

She found a compromise by giving her sons a small dose, with very specific parameters...She allowed her sons to play with little wooden rifles on Saturday mornings.

Play with Guns Ground Rules

Her ground rules:

1. Everyone has to be on the same team.

2. It is absolutely forbidden to point the guns at each other.

3. Everyone has to be having fun.

She continues, “If any of these ground rules were broken, the game ended, the guns were put away, and they could try again next Saturday.”

Ms. Oppenheimer found that because her sons “had so much experience playing games that were thrilling and intricate without the use of guns, many Saturdays came and went without their rifles, because they simply forgot about them!”

She concludes that if they remembered later in the week, she would allow one hour of gun play and then they were put away until the following Saturday.


Often, the challenge for parents is to come up with some enticing alternatives to play that involves guns...try some of these...

Adventure Games without Guns

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