Words Weave Magic
7 Words that Weave Magic1. "Hmmm..." Often children want an interested listener more than a response to what they have to say. Be interested, be curious and then be quiet. Your child will likely surprise you with what they have to say! 2. " "...silence, that's right, silence As parents (and teachers), we often talk too much. Children understand the world by creating pictures in their minds. If we talk constantly, we do not allow them to develop their mental pictures. Leave some silence, some pauses, some space for pictures to develop, in your words to your children. If you are watching carefully, you will see on their faces when they've formed the picture and are ready to move on. 3. "Almost!" Using "Almost!" gives encouragement when your child is striving to accomplish a new task. It leaves the door open for improvement and, in a simple way, shows that you are interested and noticing what they are achieving. See page about offering Praise, coming soon. 4. "...yet." Encouraging children is an important part of parenting. When a child is feeling discouraged about not being able to do a physical task or an academic task, you can offer encouragement by reflecting the task and adding "yet" to the conversation. "Oh, you aren't able to solve that algebra equation, yet." 5. "You may..." When parents say, "You may..." it is as if you are giving them permission to do something...and children will eagerly take up the task. Parents are surprised when they say, "You may brush your teeth now," and previous arguments are suddenly put to rest. These words encourage and demonstrate your belief of what they can accomplish. 6. Avoid Asking "Why?" When you ask your children why they did something, they will likely answer: "I don't know" and they truly don't. Or ask them why and they'll say, "Because..." and you will get a long-winded story. Neither answer is very productive so avoid asking why. Ask your question with who, what, when, where and how instead. 7. "I love you!" You may have grown up in a family where affection was not often shown or words of love were not often spoken. I believe that our 'culture of reserve' is changing and it is important for parents to speak and demonstrate love for their children daily and in a way that feels natural. Even when teens seem to resist affection or 'gushy' words, they still need to hear from you ~ write them a note or send them a text, (but don't over do it, of course!) I hope these words will encourage you to weave magic in your home. Rudyard Kipling said, "Language is the most powerful drug known to mankind."Parents, use that 'power' to inspire and encourage your children! For more about the magic of language go to the Language of Parenting
|
